Communicate yourself into connection.


The deepest yearning that all of us souls share is the need for love, acceptance and connection. Yet the feeling of connection often seems to disappear when communication fails, taking with it the experience of love and acceptance.

All of us know what it feels like to experience that sense of disconnect from somebody we love. We can feel that there is something that the other person isn’t sharing. We feel the energy of what is being left unsaid. Emotions are energy at their core, as we are energy. When these emotional energies do not get processed this energy remains, builds up, thickens and ultimately will disconnect the individuals from themselves.

These are the “blocks” or “walls” people refer to when they feel stuck or have a sense that something is hindering them. Unprocessed and unexpressed emotions store and they can and will weigh you down.

When things do not get spoken we can almost see the pink elephant in the room. And as the elephant grows, the other person begins to feel more distant.

Many do not feel comfortable, safe or manly enough to calmly express how they are feeling. Most of us were never taught. This means, do not take the communication shortcomings of another person personal. It’s not that they don’t want to express themselves to you, they aren’t capable of expressing themselves to anybody.

Communication is the key to all successful relationships. ALL!

I am not suggesting screaming matches or break down temper tantrums. I am speaking of calm, elegant and safe expression of emotions or feelings about situations. Only speak your words when you have calmed down to the level of honoring and respectful conversation. Expression is not about blame or shame, that’s ego, but expression is about clearing the space of energy between two or more people.

Much of the art of communication has to do with being heard.

See, as we overcome any fear of sharing ourselves, there is nothing more rewarding and loving than another person genuinely interest in hearing what and how you feel. When a person is able to listen without judgment, simply for the sake of hearing you, deep healing is possible for both sides.

There is no need to offer solution, there is no need for advice; emotions don’t need advise.

Not everybody is conscious of the importance of expression as well as of hearing and understanding what the other is experiencing. If this is the case in your life and you find yourself surrounded by the lack of expression, low confidence in communication or the absence of somebody hearing you, then you must focus on expressing to and with yourself first.

Many of us do not process our emotions properly and most of us do not acknowledge or communicate what the experience meant to us on deeper levels. I encourage self-communication because it is an easy way of understanding and releasing what lies beneath the surface of what affected you. It is important to learn how to understand your own personal emotions first.

By expressing to yourselve, without censoring, you allow for the accumulated energy to flow and possibly teach you more about what you need to learn.

Get clear on how you are feeling and what your environment is triggering within you. It may just be the dawning of change; change in scenery or change within your relationships. But as we know, it always starts with you and the more you can hear yourself with unconditional acceptance and love, the stronger you will grow to create the necessary change. Remember emotions are harmless, as long as you can keep your head out of them and just feel.

When this place of safe expression is present within any relationship, the love, the trust and the connection deepens tremendously. We feel closer to this person, we feel safe and loved. This is the feeling of connection and belonging we all yearn for on the deepest levels of our Being. It will bring closeness to both parties, the one who speaks and the one who listens. Fueling ultimate connection in our humanity.

In the end it is our emotions that make us Human. It is the fearless sharing of these energies that interconnects us with others, brings us closer and illuminates our hearts with compassion and care. Emotions aren’t bad, scary or wrong. On the contrary, emotions are powerful communication tools to learn more about our environments and ourselves. So don’t hold them back but don’t unconsciously act them out either!

They are yours and they are sacred. Take responsibility for them first and then express them freely and courageously.

Watch what will happen!

With blessings of love and light to you and yours,





Thought triggers Emotion and Emotion triggers Thought.

Have you ever heard the saying “Do one thing each day that frightens you?”
This is to encourage movement … leaving the old stagnant ways of being and trying something new … not getting too comfortable in old/programmed ways.

So let’s focus on the emotions.  Again, ways of thinking and feeling are most often learned through life experiences and learned conditioning.  Therefore something that feels ‘good’ to you isn’t necessarily good for you. And something that feels ‘bad’ to you isn’t necessarily bad for you. The goal is to not let emotions fool you and keep you locked into old cycles.

Of course ultimately we want to achieve a mostly positive range of emotion. Some say that the only emotions to operate out of are acceptance, enjoyment and enthusiasm.  Sadly our culture does not teach or encourage us to feel or to pay attention to emotion. If at all, it is primarily a job reserved for women. There is some truth to this because women are the feeling, intuitive feminine right side of the brain. Men are the thinking, strong, action left side of the brain. Now, even though this is the case, we all think and we all feel. There is a time and a place to do both.
My intention is healing the self … to become balanced within all aspects of the self. And this is where I am coming full circle again.

Since the thought affects the emotion and the emotion affects the thought lets choose to focus on the emotion for this time. Why? Because our planet is coming into huge emotional shifts. Emotions are the salt and pepper of life … they make us feel alive.

The cycle of emotion-thought-emotion-thought more often than not needs to be interrupted, especially when in a heightened emotional state of anxiety, anger, frustration, fear, stress, guilt.  Try this … and since you are probably relaxed reading this right now, imagine yourself in a stressful situation, feeling completely overwhelmed by some circumstance of your life. The thoughts are wronging the situation and the emotions are fueling the thoughts.

TIME OUT. Take a time out. And here it is, focus on your breath. Remember your best friend ‘the Breath?’ Now you have to really take time out, I don’t care if you have to go to the bathroom to take time away from the situation. Start breathing.

Allow yourself to feel. Shut of your mind. Do not let any thoughts that want to justify, blame, explain as to why you are feeling this way occupy your mind. This is all about your breath and your emotions. Breathe into your emotions. No thoughts!!! Simply breathe and feel. Get in touch with what you are feeling and how does this really feel?

Embrace what you are feeling. Be your own parent and tell yourself that it is o.k. to feel. Breathe into the emotions and observe what an incredible, emotionally loaded, miraculous Being you are. The more you relax into feeling and being o.k. with it, the more it disappears. It neutralizes. And these are the benefits of this exercise:

  • You are acknowledging your emotional Body.
  • You are moving through your emotions without judging yourselves or others.
  • You are releasing the emotions and are not storing them into your Body.
  • You are not engaging into a vicious cycle of working yourself up.
  • You are not acting or speaking out of the-by now- released emotions.

Instead, you get to feel good about yourself. Feel proud of yourself for taking responsibility. Now you are able to find constructive thoughts. Solution thinking. Goal thinking. Thinking about what to communicate and how. You get to be in charge. Furthermore you are feeling better. You successfully took yourself out of an old programming that in the past hurt your emotional, physical and energetic Body. Congratulations!!!

Practice and consistency are the keys to success here. The stronger the emotional pattern/programming the more patient and consistent you want to be. Do not make it a thing. Lovingly and patiently keep aware that you are actually creating physical changes, re-wiring your neural pathways and shifting into positive peptide production. You are a miracle of life. So enjoy your ability to feel and allow it to move you into aliveness.

Be advised that just because something triggered you into feeling something, didn’t necessarily mean that all the emotions were from this particular incident. Stored, unreleased, unacknowledged emotions built up and make one more tense. Instead, Breath!

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