Boundaries! (September blog)

Boundaries1

September Blog 2014

Boundaries!

Like’em or not – they reflect your level of self-esteem.

We are living in a world where grown men treat life in ways – as if they are playing a casual game of risk.  I look out into this world and see the disconnect from themselves within people.

We the people, the masses have to step up and learn how to set healthy boundaries.  It is a very important aspect of your individual work.  After all it is your relationship with yourself that reflects outward into the world.  How much you love, cherish and honor yourself will immediately affect how much you are able to respect and honor another.

Yes we are all different and yes we all have a right to be unique but we must learn to co-exist in a peaceful way, despite our differences.

You are in the experience of “I”, “Single Identity” or “Individual” for a reason.  Yes we are all one and interconnected but here on earth you are meant to learn your self-love and worth within relationships as “I”.  When you honor your own needs, space and your truth, you will naturally set healthy boundaries.

A lot of people don’t like “boundaries”.  Some even feel that boundaries need to be broken down.  But in truth, boundaries are the success ingredient to all healthy relationships, including the one with YOU.

Boundaries are meant to shift, change and evolve.  Really, boundaries indicate how close your loving and honoring relationship is with yourself. They are an invisible force field that keeps you in touch with how you are feeling, protects you from others unconsciousness and holds you in alignment with your own self-worth.

As you go through life, your life will change, your life’s circumstances will change and you will change.  As your life changes you will want to maintain an awareness of your boundaries and adjust them accordingly.

Here are some examples of unhealthy dynamics while in relationships:

–       Do you feel you have to alter your-self to fit the other’s mood?

–       Are you unable to speak your truth?

–       Are you finding yourself making excuses for the other?

–       Do you feel nervous, anxious and insecure when with a specific person?

–       Do you feel responsible for their happiness? Are you the fixer/doer?

–       Is there an underlying guilt game happening?

–       Do you allow certain inappropriate behaviors that make you feel bad? Do you accept things just to keep the peace?

–       Are you unable to focus on yourself/needs/happiness?

–       Are you unsure of how you are feeling or what you want?

–       Are your feelings not being valued?

–       Are you giving more than you have to give?

Most people do not mean to make you feel uncomfortable. And most people aren’t aware of your discomfort when you do not express it.   Therefore it is your job to draw clear boundaries for all to understand, most importantly YOU!

Here are some keys to help you reinforce your boundaries:

1) Get clear on your needs.  Take the time and space you need to recognize what works for you and what doesn’t.  Make a list of the things you want to change about yourself and about what behaviors from others is not acceptable anymore.

2) Communicate clearly and calmly what has been bothering you.  Honor your feelings, no matter what! Announce the changes.

3) Stay consistent with your new boundaries. Most people resist change but over time it will become normal and they will accept the change.  It will become the “new normal”.

4) Take responsibility for your own emotional triggers. If you are feeling triggered, it means it is your healing opportunity. Do not cast blame because if you would be able to stay calm, you wouldn’t have a trigger in the first place.

5) Give a little to get a little.  All relationships are about compromise and working together.  Don’t be too extreme with your boundaries but let them grow and evolve in time. It always takes two to tango, you allowed it and the readjustment process takes time.

I am wishing for you to walk in the grace and love of your own light.  I am wishing you happiness and clarity.

You deserve a joyous life!

With love and light,

Britta

Be powerful!

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Marianne Williamson said “It is not our darkness that frightens us but our light”.  You know this to be true!

Imagine yourself brighter, lighter, stronger,  authentically empowered and filled to the brim with self-esteem and self-love.  What would you do?  Or better yet, what wouldn’t you do? Who would you be if you let your true power shine?   You can see where I am getting at, yes?

Fact is, you aren’t in your full empowerment yet!  Almost nobody is! You have to grow into it, it doesn’t shift from 0 – 100 overnight.  It is a process. A big aspect of this shifting is you not being afraid of your power.  You won’t abuse it because your heart is open and you will monitor yourself. Others may disapprove, get jealous or simply feel threatened by your light but guess what, too bad!

Think of a person whom you admire, a person who is balanced in their masculine and feminine power; such power is beautiful, isn’t it.  It is attractive, magnetic and inspiring.  It is time for you to reveal your power. Find the images and feelings of how you will be, act, speak, think and how it feels to be fully open to life!  You owe it to yourself, to Humanity and to our beloved planet.

You are an extension of source, you are made in God’s like, you are infinite possibilities incarnate.  Yes, of course you are powerful beyond measure and now the time has come for you to focus on it.  Remember you are energy and what you focus on grows, it is what you feed.  So feed your light and be who you have come here to be, powerful beyond measure!

With gratitude, love and light,

Britta

 

Change creates change.

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Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” – Albert Einstein

Even though most of us don’t like change, change is the only constant in life.                                                                                                        To stay empowered and in charge of your experiences, you will do best if you are the “change maker”.

Look for areas in your life where you would like to see different results. Don’t wait for those areas to change by themselves, take change into your own hands. Observe yourself and find new perspectives, choose more compassionate responses, listen without thinking about what you want to say, communicate your truth in a calm way and behave in new and more supportive ways for example.  There are unlimited ways in which you can take change into your own hands.  And since change creates change, you will witness and feel the differences this “taking charge” will give to you, in yourself.

When you take the initiative to create conscious change you will begin to feel the strength and authentic empowerment this will give to you.  Being a “change maker” will spark your confidence and self esteem deep within you.  Once you understand this concept and feel the results of it, you will begin to enjoy creating change and the domino effect it will have.

To all you “change makers”…. Go and have fun creating positive change.

Blessings, Love and Light,

Britta

 

 

 

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